A few tips. For those people who want to be as cool as me, that is.

So I have been on this whole "get Brit healthy" kick for a surprisingly long time now.  And I figure, if I can keep at it for this long, considering my awesomely short attention span, I should probably hand out a few of my tricks of the trade.

• Get fired from your job.  When you cannot afford to buy groceries, let alone fast food, you cannot afford to still be fat curvy.

• Run at night.  Like, late late at night.  Why?  A few reasons:

1.  It is easy to imagine that I am running from a psychotic serial killer/rapist.  Talk about motivation to keep moving.
2.  I get the most entertaining looks from my neighbors as I leave my apartment at 11 'o clock at night in head-to-toe black underarmour and running shoes.  Geez, what do you think I'm doing?  About to rob a bank?  Oh, wait, yeah, they do.
3. No one sees me pathetically grasping my ipod in one hand and my inhaler in the other.  Actually, no one sees me at all.  I'll save the daylight, in-plain-sight-of-everyone runs for when I can really stop traffic.  :)  (and yes, I mean in a good way.)
4. Even if I did run into someone on my scenic trail behind the jail, they would probably avoid me.  Since it is generally colder at night than it is during the day, and usually warmer anywhere other than WI in November, my 30+ layers of clothing probably make me look like some sort of deranged grizzly bear in the dark.  Or than derelict homeless guy from that one nightmare of mine...

• Uh...  I had thunk up a few more on my run but they went *poof*.

Considering my laziness, and yes it is a widely known thing and I have come to terms with it, I know some people are wondering why or how I even got myself to keep with this running thing.  Simple:  I've been using it as punishment.  Anytime I can't sleep, I have no choice other than to run.  Since, ya know, I can't spend every night posting late night blog posts.  Aaaaaaand, well it helps that I just spent a ridiculous chunk of my paycheck (which is a precious commodity, mind you) on the aforementioned head-to-toe black underarmour.  OH!  And back to my first point:  when you spend a sizeable piece of paycheck on running gear, you can't afford to eat.  Voila!  More calories lost!

And now that I've made myself sound like an anorexic, I am going to sign off.  Toodles!